


Joined at the hip

by TheDalmatian



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: 2009!phan, Alien!Dan, Aliens, Backstory, Conspiracy Theory, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Humor, Other, alien!phil, but as aliens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-20
Updated: 2018-02-20
Packaged: 2019-03-21 16:46:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13745151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDalmatian/pseuds/TheDalmatian
Summary: Dan and Phil are secretly aliens from another planet and they came down and they have to stay together because they're symbiotes and they have to live off of each other.-----This has probably been done already but here is my take on expanding jacksepticeye's theory about Dan and Phil. The backstory of who the two famous YouTubers really are, how they landed on earth and their difficult journey afterwards.Unbeta'd, so sorry for any mistakes (especially with the tenses)





	Joined at the hip

Dan sleepily entered the lounge, laptop under his arm and a mug of hot chocolate in his hand. He yawned as he made his way to his favourite spot on the sofa, next to Phil who was already there, occupied with browsing twitter. He plumped down and opened his laptop, getting into browsing position, ready to not leave this spot for the next hours.

But of course, he should have counted on Phil to interfere with his cosiness. The minute he'd made himself comfortable, the other man turned to him and started whining.

“I'm hungry”, Phil complained, making puppy eyes at Dan.

Dan groaned. “We still have leftovers from yesterday in the fridge. Go help yourself”, he replied.

“No Dan, I'm _hungry_ ”, Phil insisted, leaning in closer.

Dan finally looked up from his laptop into Phil's eyes. There was a sparkle, a desire for something that went beyond anything human, anything a creature on this planet could understand. Dan knew this look all too well.

He sighed. “Fine”, he grumbled, sitting up and turning his body to face the other man.

Phil let out a happy squeak. He immediately grabbed his shirt and pulled it over his head, exposing his bare torso to Dan. Any human watching this, any of their _audience_ in particular, would surely expect something sexual to happen next, some proof once and for all that the two of them were dating. Dan was sure that nobody would expect what was _actually_ about to happen.

Phil's belly paled, losing even the few bits of colour there were, only for five identical spots to appear. Dan never got sick of watching that beauty. Green, purple, blue, a hint of brown and a colour that was impossible for human eyes to see, all glittering in a way that indicated how out of this world they were. The spots grew bigger, until they were about the size of a coin, then something under the skin started moving, like a hundred spiders trapped underneath, trying to free themselves. But it wasn't spiders that burst through the belly, reaching out, dancing around as if they'd been constrained for too long – which they probably had been. Five long, thick limbs stretched out, searching for their counterpart, reaching out in the direction of Dan. If there was any human word that could describe them, _tentacles_ probably came closest.

“Please Dan”, Phil groaned, “it's been too long.”

Dan sighed again, but he couldn't deny that he himself had started to feel _hungry_ now. That special hunger that no human food, but in fact only one person in the entire universe could satisfy.

Dan lifted his own shirt, not completely taking it off, just enough to let his own tentacles escape. Contrary to Phil's, they were completely black, but with the same kind of strange glitter covering them. Just as Phil's they reached out, lusting for what only their counterpart could give them.

Dan couldn't help the small moan that escaped his lips as their alien limbs connected, fusing in a way that was unique to each pair, until five strong, pulsating pipes stood strongly between them and linked both of their bodies together.

Phil had already closed his human eyes, concentrating on the energy flow that was slowly building up. Dan did the same, focusing on the energy inside him, pushing out what his own body couldn't handle but Phil's needed badly. In return, he felt a different kind of energy flowing into him, strengthening him, filling his veins and every fibre of his human and non-human body. It tasted so good, in a way that earth creatures could never feel, like the pleasure of a sixth sense they were missing.

The process took quite a while and Dan leaned back, closing his eyes and losing himself in the feeling. Humans valued sex as one of the best sensations, but only because they had never experienced _this_. Also they valued love as the strongest emotion, but Dan had witnessed how weak their _love_ was, rarely lasting forever, disappearing if it was not taken care of. _Love_ was nothing compared to what connected Dan and Phil. Humans chose different partners over the course of their lifetime, trying out, testing which one was the right one for them. On Dan and Phil's home planet, Kryxtàr, things were different. At the age of 284 ornz, Kryxtàrians would form partnerships, and the one partner they chose would be the one to stay with them for their whole life. They would form a bond, orientating their body, metabolism and biostructure to the other person, making it impossible to ever leave their side for too long or they would starve because of the energy they needed to feed from their partner regularly. Dan shuddered at the memory of how this had almost happened to them once.

He adored Phil. From the moment they had bonded this feeling had been there, the feeling of security and the feeling that he would never let anyone harm his partner. The feeling of never being lonely again. Dan could be snappy at times, shutting people out, hating the entire world. But he always had a soft spot for Phil. Sometimes, too soft. Like the time they had found this strange looking blue planet, _Earth_ as its inhabitants called it.

“Ooooooh look at it”, Phil had said, tapping at the window of their spaceship. “It's beautiful!”

“Hm. I guess”, Dan had simply replied, but he hadn't been able to hide the small smile that always appeared on his lips whenever Phil got excited about something.

“Can we get closer, pleeeeease?”

“No, we shouldn't do that. It's too dangerous. What if it's inhabited, we could be noticed.”

Phil had made puppy eyes at him. They always worked wonders. Especially if you took into account that their species had 13 eyes. There had been a lot of pleading from every single one of them.

Dan had grumbled, but given in. “Fine. But just one ornz, and then we'll go back and leave this planet alone.”

In his human body now, Phil would have let out a squeal. In his true body, the sound of excitement sounded more like a horde of earth buffaloes stomping through a field of angry birds. “Thank yoooouuuu! Oooooh, can I steer the spaceship?”

Dan had no idea what in the universe had gotten into him at that moment to agree to that. His partner was adorable in so many ways, but about as clumsy as a five-legged rhöord without its tail. Dan still wasn't sure how exactly it had happened, but suddenly they had found themselves crashing down through the atmosphere of the blue planet, unable to control the ship any longer. Only the emergency evacuation option had save their lives. But, as unpredictable as it was, it had catapulted them away separately, and they had landed on the planet's surface 21 iirtz (about 170 earth miles) apart from each other.

Dan still remembered how lost he had felt, finding himself in that strange earth town called _Reading_ , his partner nowhere in sight. Fortunately, he had adapted quite quickly, disguising himself as a teenage human boy and altering the memories of a human family and their surroundings to make them believe he had always been a part of their lives. As it turned out, humans' lives had their pros and cons. The food, Dan had to admit, was delicious. Even though it could not actually satisfy his hunger, only Phil could do that, he very much enjoyed the earthlings' food. But then there was this thing called school, a terrible place. Dan had no idea why humans would force their children to go there. It was boring and Dan despised some of the human teenagers he'd met there.

Plus, the panic of having to find Phil had always been in the back of his mind. He could only survive without him for so long before his energy level would drop too low and he would starve. He'd had no idea however how he was supposed to find him. This planet had no pzarçsa, connecting all individuals on the planet to each other. He'd only found this _Internet_ , which was a horrendously obsolete version of pzarçsa. But well, he'd had to take what he got.

Dan had spent ages on his computer, browsing websites, looking for any sign of his lost partner. He'd stayed inside as much as he could, doing nothing and saving energy, because there had been no way of knowing how long it would take to find him. He'd just hoped that Phil had had the same idea and was trying to reach out to him too, using the _internet_.

As it turned out, Phil had been the one to find this video platform, _YouTube_ , first. At first, Dan had not realised who he was, looking so different in his human body than he was used to. And this name, _Philip_ , it had sounded so strange to Dan's ears. To be fair though, having ears in general had been strange to Dan. But his partner had dropped small hints in his videos. What looked like normal vlogs to humans were in fact secret messages to Dan, revealing who he really was.

First of all there was the lion, looking remarkably similar to a tmühpaer, Phil's favourite animal on Kryxtàr. Also the dyed black hair. Dan had been sure that it had meant to symbolise the colour of his own skin in his other form.

Dan had tried to contact Phil, but it had been much harder than he'd thought. Who would have thought that so many _humans_ would show interest in him as well and try everything to contact him? But Phil was Dan's partner, and he would not give up. He'd stalked him, replied to every tweet within seconds, desperate to get his attention and giving small hints himself about who he was. Yes, he liked M.U.S.E (méhdyak uorgh sköldna erf, the kryxtàrian name for the ceremony that formed the bond between partners), too. Oh, he loved Llamas (which resembled bjourkkhz, his own favourite animal). And, again and again, he'd told Phil how much he'd needed to be with him.

It had taken a while, but eventually, Phil had caught on. They had started talking on skype, immensely glad that they had finally found each other again. It had taken them a bit more time to figure out the human displacement methods, or _public transportation system_ as they called it, but finally, Dan had managed to book a _train_ to get him to Manchester.

Dan thought that he had never been happier in his life than at that moment at the train station in Manchester. Seeing his partner again had almost made up for all that time they'd been apart and they'd spent the entire night in Phil's room, feeding off each other. They'd even made a video together, unable to contain their joy.

After that, things had been easier. They had still not known how to get off that planet and therefore had had to keep their human identities. For that reason there had still been times of them being apart, but bit by bit they figured out ways too stay closer together. Dan had moved to Manchester, then they had moved in together, and by now they were practically inseparable. Their YouTube-thing had turned out to be a reliable source of making _money_ , something humans required if they wanted basically anything. So they had continued it. Plus, it was a great way to connect with the humans. They were both still quite wary of them and spent most of their time inside their apartment, but through YouTube, they had managed to get to know a few nice ones. All in all, they were happier than ever.

Dan was still lost in his memories when he felt a pull at his tentacles, and the connection to Phil broke off. He let a small noise of displeasure and opened his eyes. Phil looked at him, grinning but eyes fond.

“Who is the needy one, now”, Phil said with a small chuckle as he slowly retracted his tentacles back into his human body.

Dan grumbled, but couldn't be mad at the other person. Being filled up with fresh energy always left him in a state of euphoria. “This felt good”, he said, a small smile on his lips.

“Yes”, Phil smiled back, “thank you!”

“So”, Dan said, changing the topic, “are your plans on contacting Kryxtàr making any progress?”

Phil let out a sigh. “Not really”, he admitted. “There's just nothing on this planet that could be helpful in any way. At this point, we have to face the possibility that we might be stuck here forever.”

Dan stayed surprisingly calm. “You know what”, he said smiling fondly now, “as long as the two of us stay together, it doesn't even sound that bad.”

Phil was surprised. “But you hate humans”, he pointed out.

“Most of them”, Dan corrected him. “And I love making videos for them. It's so weird how many of them relate to our alien problems on this planet.”

Phil thought about that for a second. “You think we're not the only aliens on this planet?”

Dan shrugged. “Who knows. But we don't seem to be too suspicious, so that's good. As long as you manage to keep your weirdness to a normal level.”

“Hey, I'm an alien on a strange planet, I'm allowed to be a bit weird. And it's not my fault weird things keep happening to me here”, he protested, “ _You_ on the other hand should lighten up a little in your videos, your constant negativity is starting to not be believable anymore.”

“Hey, I'm an alien trapped on a strange planet, I'm allowed to be depressed about that”, Dan countered.

“But you're trapped here with me”, Phil said with a grin.

Those words made Dan feel warm on the inside. “Forever here with you”, he agreed. “Let's never be apart again. Let's be so close that we make people wonder if we're joined at the hip.”

Phil chuckled. “Let's hope no one ever starts wondering about that, or they might find out about our secret. We'd have to–”

“No one will, I'm sure”, Dan interrupted him. “Now, leave me alone. You've interrupted my browsing session for long enough.” His words were snippy, but he was unable to hide the endearment from his voice.

He turned to his laptop, clicking on the latest video by jacksepticeye. _Would you rather #19_. That sounded fun.

Halfway through, the smile disappeared from his lips.

“Well, fuck!”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading, this was done in a hurry so I'm sorry if it's a bit rushed and there are mistakes in there. Also my head is spinning from making up all those alien words.  
> let me know what you think, comments are always appreciated :)


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